ALL ABOUT FRIENDS DATING & ONLINE CHATROOMS

Friendship: A treasure that we must find and retain

Usually, we love having friends, human beings are social by nature, grow and mature when dealing with others. And as the company primarily provides family, affection daily unconditional support, emotional stability and a transcendental dimension of life (a joint project, the progress of our children), friends preferably provide fresh air, diversity, entertainment, the possibility to develop hobbies and communicate in an atmosphere of warmth and naturalness. And, not infrequently, the opportunity to escape from everyday problems. But not all friends are equally important, we talk today of those who show interest in what happens to us, for those who are always willing to provide advice, support, closeness and affection, in other words, good friends, the essentials.

Most of us have friends, or have had them. But over time, change our way of being, we married and have kids and that brings us to focus on other priorities. Other obstacles include the distance driven, for example, by a change of residence. One possible brake more: to share with our partners and friends with his friends. It is not having many friends, but enough to meet our needs for social interaction. Moreover, as the years pass, some tend to become more craftier, reserved, selfish, manic or individualistic. Thus, we demanding and less open, tolerant and understanding, with horror what it costs us to make new friends and even keep the ones we had. With how easy it is to lose a friend, how difficult it is to recover, we think, as if the fault is not ours. But we know that a person who shows ability to make new friends and open-mindedness shows a sociability than those who were unable to do so.

Each person, however, is a world: some like to close friends and others prefer a more superficial, but there are those who have few close friends while sharing with others less personal social life. The key is not having many friends, but enough to satisfy our need for relationship outside the family, neighbors or work. We have many friends and that, however, we do not "fill." In this case, it is time to consider the need to change or expand our network of friends.

Giving and receiving: Friendship is a reciprocal relationship. There is no point you want to maintain a friendship with someone, two people have to want it and must participate in a similar concept of what friendship means and the implications involved. To consider and decide on our doubts, to support without collapsing the frustrations and pain, we need experience, knowledge and assurances they have also come from our foreign and our family. Thanks to the friends we get to know us and we develop the company needed to go through life without undue fear of falling, since they act as a buffer, as a fulcrum to move forward. Not with all the friends we keep the same emotional closeness. The difference lies in how much and how we share, in the degree of involvement and intimacy in which we interact. Difficult situations for which we all are responsible for distinguishing the quality of our friendships. Because it is very common for friends of a lifetime to maintain a superficial relationship in which shared leisure time is the only depiction of the relationship. On the other hand, the relationship we have with friends is different from the couple, acting on different planes of our life, but hardly comparable complementary. We share friends with our partner, but is richer keep some that are exclusively ours.

Because there are friends and "friends": A little lifestyle open to others. If we do not provide opportunities to interact and do nothing to change, loneliness is our only company. Low self-esteem and inferiority complex. If we do not trust the value of our contribution, we will tend to underestimate and isolate. Few people are less interesting than those that have a low opinion of themselves. If we think we are worthless, it is difficult we do any thing, let alone if it involves a risk of failure. And when the proposal comes from outside relationship, it is likely that fear, not the call or do not know do so effectively.

Fears. A dislike, not to meet the expectations we have of ourselves, not to rise to the occasion. Fear that if we know thoroughly, leave us. The lack of communication skills. Say what you think is not the problem, but how you say. Empathy (putting in place of another) and assertiveness (and honestly express ourselves freely, without hurting or belittling) are key. The self-deception. We believe that all we are always available to the other and, therefore, expect everything from our friends. Hoarding and tension to submit to the friends who makes about moving away and we end up short on a sense of incomprehension that reinforces the delusion.

Pretender being right, act in a haughty, intolerant or mean. The coldness, both verbal and in the field of gesture. The lack of emotion, closeness of a hug, a caress. To be a good friend involves...

* Get out of your shell: out there are not dangers but opportunities to meet through others.
* Evaluate who you are and your skills, and tries to find what you're providing and what you can make if you put your mind.
* Watch your form of expression: keep a positive attitude and respectful. Ask what you need. Thanks for what you are given and apologizes if you have offended.
* Show yourself as you are, not as you think others want you to be. Honesty begins within oneself.
* Be generous in sharing, so things like feelings and opinions.
* Spend regular time with your friends, they are not the solution for when you have nothing else to do. Trasmíteles, your daily attitude, which occupy an important place in your life
* Mima relationship with interest and dedication.
* Show sensitivity and affection. Use kind and loving gestures. When the words are useless, we need support, affection and understanding
* A good friendship is a treasure that we must preserve. There is little annoyances that can not be overcome between real friends. Let the pride aside and do everything possible to restore harmony.
* And most importantly, a good friend will attend and listen whenever you really need it.

Chat Rooms chatrooms and places to find new friends online

One of the most popular Internet applications, are the chat rooms or chat rooms where users typed in real time ('chat') with users from around the world. Compared to other ways of communicating through the Internet, such as email, forums or mailing lists, chat offers both the opportunity to talk simultaneously and instantaneously with multiple users. In the chat room just the usual precautions apply real-world. Chats have become very popular as a way to contact people anywhere in the world, share hobbies or exchanging files (songs about everything), but perhaps more frequent use of trying to make new friends or directly 'linked' , which sometimes results in actual encounters.

The most popular programs: The system used for real-time conversations on the Internet is known as IRC (Internet Relay Chat). To participate in these discussions or chat rooms only need to connect to the Internet and access any IRC servers (computers that manage chat rooms) scattered throughout the world that harbor channels, that is, the 'rooms' where users Departed . Enter a chat room with other Internet users is extremely simple. There are two common ways to chat through website or by installing special software on your computer as mIRC (http://www.mirc.com) or Pirch (www.pirchat.com) for Windows, Ircle (www . ircle.netmug.org) for Mac and ircII (www.eterna.com.au / ircii) for Linux. All can be downloaded from the Internet for free. The difference between accessible through the web or through a specific program is similar to that between access an email account such as Yahoo or Hotmail or do so through an application on your computer like Outlook or Mozilla Thunderbird: the web is slower and offers less options but is simpler.

Whether through a website (many sites and most sites offer webchat IRC networks) or a program, to enter a chat room simply identified by a nickname (nick) and choose a channel in which to participate or simply read what others write. The nick is the user's identity on IRC, so there can be no two alike in the same network at the same time and in some cases, you can register to keep forever and no one impersonates your identity. It is relatively easy to handle in a chat, but the neophyte he should watch and learn before participating. For quick start there's nothing like asking fellow members, access to channels for beginners (# irchelp, # beginner, # ayuda_IRC, etc.) Where questioning without fear or visit one of the numerous websites for gutting the IRC world, such that www.irchelp.org or www.ayuda-irc.net.

There are thousands of channels (groups or rooms are appointed with a front pad) to choose from, from those created to discuss a particular topic (eg, # psychology) or those intended to bring together users of the same area (# barcelona) or the same age (# Mas_de_30), even simple gatherings of friends. Anyone can create a channel, give the name you want provided it does not exist in the network and impose their conditions: it must be public or not appearing on the list of channels, which is moderate, only accessible to guests with limited participants, etc. The 'operator' of the channel, with no power to admit or expel fellow members, is identified with an @ in front of his name. In the channels is also possible to establish private conversations with any of the participants by clicking on its name.

Keep in mind that there are many chat networks that are connected together, so that users who enter through different networks can not communicate, though come to the same channel (the network can share channel names). To chat in Spanish, the network's most popular IRC-Hispano, with about 4,000 channels that connect more than half a million Internet users each day.

Safety and safe chatting: Unfortunately, the chat networks are not exempt from the dangers lurking on the Internet. Because you can exchange files through the chat, you must have the same care as with email attachments and file downloads on the web to avoid being infected by a virus. Do not accept files from strangers at the same time it is recommended to protect your computer with an anti-virus software and a firewall ("firewall" or software that controls the Internet connection) that will prevent external attacks. A common threat to any application connected to the Internet, in chat rooms should be added those arising from real world connection. Without resorting to scaremongering, they have to be aware that you can not really know who is hiding behind the pseudonym, which may not be who said it or not have the intentions that claims to have. Therefore, it is sufficient to consider the usual precautions that are taken to talk to strangers (take care of personal data) and be careful at the request of appointments outside the Internet.

The largest IRC network in Spanish and one of the largest in the world is also a place where to chat or get help.
The first time www.ircbeginner.com. Among the many pages devoted to the novice in the world of chat, it is noted particularly for its large amount of information, very well ordered. Search the Channel www.searchirc.com. A directory of channels grouped by topics in which they also can be searched within 2059 IRC networks listed alphabetically, by category or activity. Located channel, just click to connect via mIRC or webchat. You must keep polite forms. The label used for any communication over the Internet ('netiquette') also serves the chats (www.ayuda-irc.net/netiqueta.shtml), which also have their own rules of conduct generally accepted.

So all cybet chatters know if it wants to be expelled from a chat room should follow the theme of the channel, do not send advertising, do not cry (use capital letters) or repeating sentences, not to abuse the scripts (added to the IRC program ) that blur the conversation with colors and new windows and, in general, meet the basic standards of education in a conversation. Do not forget that behind every nickname is a person. But IRC also has its own language where raw speed: annoy long texts (more than four lines is sin) and proliferate the use of acronyms, the letters serve as words (instead of k) and 'emoticons '(face drawn with punctuation marks to represent states of mind). However, a territory chats are open to novices, where the norm is to find people willing to help and where only a maximum bonus: "Be nice, play fair and have fun!"

New trend: lending money online among friends.

Self-sustaining communities are networks of people with scarce resources together to meet specific expenses. Once a month, a group of friends, neighbors and relatives gather to borrow money. They form a network in which each member contributes between 20 and 150 euros, which qualify for a loan up to four times higher. When a group member has a need, the poses and, together, decide whether or not to grant you a loan. The last thing they worry about is if the money back into their hands. Know they will in the mode and time allowed.

Basic principle: there must be confidence and trust each other. They are part of a community self-financing. Trust is the pillar of self-sustaining communities (CHAF), a group of between 10 and 30 people with scarce economic resources that lend money among themselves to face any mishap. Each member of the group are required to have a minimum income and make a down payment of 20 to 150 euros, depending on the possibilities of each. This amount entitles you to receive a loan up to four times the amount contributed and can be recovered if at any time you leave the community. The initiative is supported by the CHAF Association, a nonprofit organization specializing in developing community-based organizations. Your task is to "create networks of citizens in poor neighborhoods to build trust and bring the community together," explains Rodríguez-Fera, president of the association. This organization provides support for the formation of the group, he instructed in basic accounting, assists in the development of accompanying regulations and the management process. "But are the members of each group who actually carry on," says Rodriguez-Fera.

The groups are formed, 80%, for immigrants, poor or needy. Thanks to these funds, they avoid the paperwork traditional banks and receive the money immediately. If the community approves, the loan is granted the same day as requested. Each member has a minimum network of people around who believe in him.In total, the Association CHAF has facilitated the creation of 22 groups in Barcelona and two in Madrid, although the methodology has been imported from South America, which currently are approximately 800 communities. In addition, two years ago began to be introduced in African countries like Senegal. A team of experts traveled there to explain the administration of networks and boost aid for men and women. "We want anyone to miss out," the president of the association.  All the group establishes the conditions under which the credit is granted, the interest rate and turnaround time

Once a month, members of each group meet, talk about their needs and together decide who is granted credit. This is usually around half of $ 350 made to cover immediate needs: invoices, remittances to the country of origin, travel, books from school ... "People really do not have to explain what he calls,". All the group establishes the conditions under which the credit is granted, the interest rate and time of return. This will ensure proper management of the operation and that no member is trying to reach a debt overhang. If the group believes that the requested loan is outstanding, are studied in depth all the details. "Sometimes people with microcredit can reach over leveraged and that is very dangerous," "Some people want to live beyond their means, but not micro-credit for that, but to meet an emergency," he adds.

Web Leader: the key figure: The key pieces are self-funded community leaders. Each community has one. The leader is a person able to mobilize a group of people, creating a network of trust and earn the respect of all its members. Has credibility and initiative. His election is the most difficult part of the project. "In fact, without them it would be impossible,".  A leader is able to mobilize a group, create a network of trust and earn the respect of its members. Leaders are not shared. They can only belong to a group. They are a partner to bring more money and can receive microcredit. Each year, appointing a board of directors and approved the charges, including the president, for that year. This ensures that all members know the functioning of the group to participate and learn better to organize a community, save money, borrow money and repay it.

The group leader is the one who is aged six or seven people you trust. Later, he accepted the arrival of new members and the departure of the former. The only condition is to make a payment or pay off debts, if any. Being based on trust, if not the money is returned to the whole group fails. To friends, neighbors and kin.